A Raven, a High School Principal, and an Elvis Impersonator Walk into a Trailer

I managed to get all my stuff into Lucky's double wide last weekend, and I've been conducting my little business out of his spare bedroom. It's an awkward arrangement, particularly since I'm now juggling several "clients" through my Web site. Lucky typically leaves for the theatre in the late afternoon, right around the time when my east coast clients start hitting the Internet. These interactions can go on into the wee hours of the morning, but Lucky tends to hang out with people from the show after the last performance, so he usually rolls in when the sun is coming up. By that time, I'm already in bed. This is throwing my sleep pattern all out of whack since I tend to be an early riser. I'm beginning to feel like a cat, catching short naps throughout the day and night, but never really sleeping a full 8 hours.

My lack of sleep isn't the only thing that's contributing to my foggy perception of the world. I feel as though I'm becoming Carla Fontaine for 12 hours and then reverting to little ol' Angie for 12 hours. The sensation is especially disconcerting when it comes to my love life. The other day, after spending hours online conducting long distance sex with a group of anonymous strangers, Lucky came home from work and became amorous. Instinctively, I found myself going into seductress mode like I had been playing all night. We were well into our love making before I realized I was playing a role and not actually focusing on the moment. Lucky seemed to enjoy it just fine, which left me even more confused. As attentive as he is to me in other ways, he tends to become a bit selfish in the bed room. I hadn't noticed that the first time we slept together because, well frankly, I was too inebriated to remember anything much. Now that we've had sex while I've been sober, his lack of skill is more apparent. Just an observation, but it seems like the more blessed a man is in the genital department, the less he thinks he needs to do to please a woman.

Anyway, my life feels like it's settling into a dysfunctional routine. Except for the other night when Lucky came home early and I was still involved in a session with one of my clients. I had to feign internet troubles to end the session quickly and straighten everything up. Lucky still walked in on me while I was dressed in a leather bikini. I couldn't very well pass it off as normal sleeping attire, so I had to think fast. Fortunately, since I already told him that I sell lingerie and other sexy items online, I just explained that I was taking some modeling shots for the Web site. The lovable dope bought it. This is really nuts.

My mom calls me almost every day. She is apparently having regular dates with my old high school principal, Brad Huggins. I don't know what bothers me more: the fact that Mom is dating so soon after Dad's death or that she taking up with my old principal. Actually, I have to realize that it's been almost a year since my father passed away, and my mom is completely on her own back in Maryland. Also, if I kind of stand back and look at Mr. Huggins objectively, he's not such a bad looking guy. I just can't shake the image of him marching around the corridors of my old high school like a martinet, checking the lavatories for wayward smokers.

It's been rather quiet lately. In between clients, I even got to catch some of the Ravens/Panthers preseason game on ESPN last night. Of course, the Ravens won. I think they could go all the way this year. I'm sure my father is looking down on me disapprovingly. Growing up in Bethesda, he was a lifelong Redskins fan while I paid no attention to football at all. Then, during my freshman year of college, I dated a guy from Baltimore who was a Ravens fan. That just happened to be the year they went to the Super Bowl, and I've been a fan ever since.

So that's this week, but I get a feeling in my bones that something's about to break loose. It always does in my life. I guess I have to enjoy the calm while I can.